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View Full Version : "WHO ARE HARDER TO RAISE...BOYS OR GIRLS?" by Erma Bombeck



FISHINLADY
05-15-2002, 12:34 PM
If you want to stir up a hornet's nest, just ask mothers, "Who are harder
> to raise - boys or girls?"
>
> The answer will depend on whether they're raising boys or girls.
>
> I've had both, so I'll settle the argument once and for all.
>
> It's girls.
>
> With boys you always know where you stand. Right in the path of a
> hurricane. It's all there. The fruit flies hovering over their waste
> can, the hamster trying to escape to cleaner air, the bedrooms decorated
> in Early Bus Station Restroom.
>
> With girls, everything looks great on the surface. But beware of drawers
> that won't open. They contain a three-month supply of dirty underwear
> and rubber bands with blobs of hair in them.
>
> You have to wonder about a girl's bedroom when you go in to make her bed
> and her dolls have a look of fear and disbelief in their eyes.
>
> A mother once wrote me to agree. She said that "after giving birth to
> three boys, I finally got a girl on my fourth try. At first, she did all
> the sweet little things I longed to see. She played coy, put her hands
> to her face when she laughed and batted her eyes like Miss Congeniality.
>
> "Then she turned fourteen months and she struck like a hurricane. When
> she discovered she could no longer sail down the bannister and make my
> hair stand on end, she turned to streaking. I'd dress her ever so
> sweetly and go to the breakfast dishes. Before one glass was washed,
> she'd strip, unlock the door and start cruising the neighborhood. One
> day, the dry cleaner made a delivery and said, 'My goodness, I hardly
> recognized Stacy with her clothes on.'
>
> "As she got older, she opened her brother's head with a bottle opener for
> taking her dolls and called the school principal a 'thug' to his face.
>
> "I'm pregnant again, and now I sleep with a football under my pillow each
> night."
>
> I knew of another mother who said, "Boys are honest. Whenever you yell
> upstairs, 'What's all that thumping about?' you get an up front reply,
> 'Joey threw the cat down the clothes chute. It was cool.'
>
> "When my daughter is upstairs playing with her dolls I yell, 'What are
> you girls doing?' She answers sweetly, 'Nothing."
>
> "I have to find out for myself that they're making cookies out of my new
> bath powder and a $12.50 jar of moisturizer.
>
> "Her pediatrician advised me to 'not notice' when she insisted on wearing
> her favorite outfit for four months. How do you ignore a long dress with
> a ripped ruffle, holes in the elbow and a Burger King crown? How would
> you handle it if you were in a supermarket and the loudspeaker announced,
> 'Attention Shoppers. We have a small child in produce wearing a long
> pink dress with a gauze apron, glittery shoes and a Burger King crown'?
>
> "Our third child was born recently. Another girl. I told the orderly to
> pass maternity and go straight to geriatrics. I rest my case. God knows
> it's the only rest I've had in six years."
>
> Girls mature faster than boys, cost more to raise, and statistics show
> that the old story about girls not knowing about money and figures is a
> myth. Girls start to outspend boys before puberty - and they manage to
> maintain this lead until death or an ugly credit manager, whichever comes
> first.
>
> Males are born with a closed fist. Girls are born with the left hand
> cramped in a position the size of an American Express card.
>
> Whenever a girl sees a sign reading, "Sale, Going out of Business,
> Liquidation," saliva begins to form in her mouth, the palms of her hands
> perspire and the pituitary gland says, "Go, Mama."
>
> In the male, it is quite a different story. He has a gland that follows
> a muscle from the right arm down to the base of his billfold pocket.
> It's called "cheap."
>
> Girls can slam a door louder, beg longer, turn tears on and off like a
> faucet, and invented the term, "You don't trust me."
>
> So much for "sugar and spice and everything nice..."
>

maddiesmommy
05-15-2002, 02:20 PM
I will show that to hubby so that I can hear him say "Well not our Madison" lol!!!!!!!!!!

FISHINLADY
05-15-2002, 02:28 PM
LOL
SHE WILL BE THE EXCEPTION!

dolphinluv
05-15-2002, 05:17 PM
Oh my gosh! and here i thought that boys were so much harder I have one of each and I swear that my son who is the youngest has taught my daughter all of his bad habbits she was great until we had him. However I would have to agree with most of the rest of it cause my son does not care what I put on him so long as it's clothes and commfy my daughter however everything has to be what in new and in style. Humm food for thought

Gladiolus
05-15-2002, 11:51 PM
ROTFL Cheaper to raise then girls!!! They never had to feed the boys then !! I go through a ton of food a week and mine are only four and nine I will hate to see what they eat when they hit the teen years!!!

FISHINLADY
05-16-2002, 09:21 AM
Originally posted by Gladiolus
ROTFL Cheaper to raise then girls!!! They never had to feed the boys then !! I go through a ton of food a week and mine are only four and nine I will hate to see what they eat when they hit the teen years!!!

YOU ARE SOOOOOOO RIGHT GLADIOLUS!!
I HAVE A 15 YEAR OLD PLUS ALL HIS TEENAGE FRIENDS AND A 7 YEAR OLD!
SOMETIMES THE 7 YEAR OLD OUTEATS THE TEENAGER!

Gladiolus
05-16-2002, 10:42 AM
My oldest eats as much as we do for regular dinner, I have to make two pizzas and it is all gone NO left overs at all!!!
and they want dessert on top of that.
They are not growing out at all just up! LOL

FISHINLADY
05-16-2002, 11:04 AM
LOL
SO HOW OLD ARE YOUR BOYS GLADIOLUS?

WHEN IT COMES TO PIZZA AROUND HERE THAT IS ONE OF THE THINGS MY YOUNGEST CAN EAT ME OUT OF HOUSE AND HOME ON!
AND WE WONT DISCUSS DESSERT LOL

Gladiolus
05-17-2002, 04:22 PM
Mine are four and nine it is actually the oldests Birthday today!!

maddiesmommy
05-17-2002, 04:47 PM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE BIG BOY!!!!!!!!!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FISHINLADY
05-17-2002, 08:18 PM
WELL HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!



http://www.plauder-smilies.de/birthday.gifhttp://www.plauder-smilies.de/party/balloons.gifhttp://www.plauder-smilies.de/partysmiley.gifhttp://www.plauder-smilies.de/party/tuut.gif

MY OLDEST WILL BE 15 NEXT WEDNESDAY!!!!

Gladiolus
05-20-2002, 05:00 PM
Thanks :-) We had a german chocolate cake forhis birthday!
He was happy got a few thingd , we're goingtohave his birthday party next weekend. :-)